Uhhh… the sea monkeys have my money…


The last vestiges of my childhood sense of wonder have just died. The have become road-kill on the information superhighway under the wheels of Wikipedia. Let me explain…
My daughter just received a box of Sea-Monkeys for her birthday. The world became a bit wavy as I flashed back to my childhood. Memories of waiting anxiously for 24 hrs. while the “Water Purifier” packet prepared my soon-to-be new best friends’ home. Then peering intently into the Sea-Monkeys kingdom as they instantly sprank to life from the contents of the “Instant Life Eggs” packet.

Being the helpful, home-schooling Dad that I am, I read through the directions, then turned to Wikipedia in hopes of mixing in a short biology lesson with this magical childhood rite of passage. Imaging the horror as I read that article. Oh, I knew they where just brine shrimp. I knew they bore no resemblance to the cherubic, finned little people portrayed on the package. I knew they didn’t grow up anxious to play games with me or take their little families on outings.

The cruel hoax that has shaken me to the core is that the “Water Purifier” packet contains eggs! That’s right, no “instant life”, no witnessing the “miracle of life before my very eyes”. The eggs take about a day to hatch and get large enough to see with the naked eye, so, while the “Instant Life Egg” packet does contain eggs, it also contains some green or blue dye to make previously hatched shrimp more visible.

Next thing you know, Wikipedia will be telling me my x-ray specs don’t really work…


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